Ode to Meeting Planners

This rhyme is for you,
And please let’s be plain.
You’re planning a conference
So you must be insane.
Perhaps you’re a newbie
And if that is so
Allow me to tell you
What the rest of us know.

You’ll visit the venue
And be treated top notch
They’ll ply you with sturgeon
And single malt scotch
But once you’ve a contract
You soon comprehend
The itemized prices
Are without an end.

“Five dollars for coffee?”
You’ll probably shout.
About the A/V fees
You’ll certainly pout.
But then comes the fun part,
The best part of all!
The moment attendees
First enter the hall.

“The rooms are too hot here!”
“The rooms are too cold!”
“There’s not enough chargers!”
“This hotel seems old!”
“A salad for lunchtime? Is that all they’ve got?”
“The Wifi is slow here!  Impressive it’s not!”

And once it’s all over
You’ll finally grin
And in two or three weeks
You’ll start it again!
You punish yourself so
But for a good cause
So please take a moment
To hear the applause.

Without you we’d never
Be leaving our homes
Without you we’d always
Be stuck on our phones.
So thank you, O thank you
For all that you do.
You keep us all learning,
That’s certainly true!